KHR React!
by Ezuiro
Summary: One day, Reborn finds a site called, 'fanfiction dot net', the heaven for all anime fantards and mostly, fujoshies aka yaoi fangirls. So, he decided to share the fanfiction made by fujoshies with the KHR cast. Oh dear...
1. React 1!

**Title: **KHR React!**  
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**Summary: **One day, Reborn finds a site called, 'fanfiction(dot)net', the heaven for all anime fantards and mostly, fujoshies aka yaoi fangirls. So, he decided to share the fanfiction made by fujoshies with the KHR cast. Oh dear...**  
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**Pairings(s): **None, its all crack with a side dish of anger, courtesy of the KHR cast.

**Warning(s): **Lots of hate on your (probably) favorite yaoi pairings(well, think about the logical reactions of the KHR cast)from the KHR cast... maybe more, but you get the point. Oh, don't forget the colorful and fancy words. If you're a hardcore yaoi fan who takes this seriously, get a life. **  
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**A/N:** Well, there's so many yaoi pairings floating around in ffnet, so why the fuck not make a fanfic about the anime cast reacting to it, logically? I'm pretty sure there's already people who did this thing, but yeah, I'm bored so... yep. You get my point.

**PS:** I'm starting with number pairings(kinda like a drabble, idk/not so sure, its a weird format), in no particular order. Hear me? **NO PARTICULAR ORDER!** So, its all in one. Also, the sentences you find for each pairing aren't from any fanfic you find in the KHR category, I wrote them myself. Yep, I feel very embarrassed doing so...

"Normal speech."

'_Thoughts._'

***Voice from above, which is Kami-sama, a.k.a the author.**

000

It all started when Reborn was using his laptop, a cup of hot espresso in his hand. He was just randomly googling(is that a word?) stuff when he found a site called 'fanfiction(dot)net'.

A heaven for anime fantards but mostly, fujoshies. A fujoshi was, well, a girl who like boy's love or a.k.a gay relationships between anime/manga characters.

Yep, that's where it all began when Reborn had an evil glint glimmering in his eyes, and one bored fantard decided to write it all down.

That fantard, well, had many names, of course. But his/her's most used and favorite was** Valehan**.

**Valehan** was well, basically the God of all his/her fanfictions, since **Valehan** did write them. **Valehan** is very strong, like a God, or Kami-sama, since he/she can make a character wear a frilly and sparkly pink tutu with a snap of his/her fingers.

Ahem, main point is that, **Valehan** placed a tiny camera in to see all the KHR cast and they couldn't detect or destroy because well, its God's toy and it is invisible.

Anyways...

000

**1827/HibaTsu/HibariTsuna**

_"And they kissed the life out of each other, savoring each other's taste, the skylark seme tasted like green tea while the tuna uke __tasted like sweet caramel..."_

"HIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" screamed Tsuna while blushing like mad, with the words 'what the heck did I just read' going in his mind. 'I like Kyoko! I like Kyoko! I like Kyoko!' he repetitively screamed in his mind, like a safety mantra.

'_Damn you, Reborn!_' he screamed once more, mentally.

He only decided to read it since it sounded so... innocent and Reborn said that he _might_ enjoy it. Well, _he was so wrong_.

Seriously, what the heck did he just read.

***I believe that you've just read something called BL or yaoi, Dame-Tsuna.**

'_Wait, who said that?_'

-0-0-

"... I'll bite the author to death." stated Hibari, and no, it was not a half-assed statement. Hibari then took his tonfas, but it wasn't his usual tonfas he used to 'bite' the people of Namimori High.

In fact, it was the one with spikes on it.

Bloody friggin' spikes.

All over.

"Kusakabe, find the real identity of a person called, [insert author's name]." ordered Hibari and again, it was not a half-assed order.

"Why, Hibari-san?"

"Because I'll bite him or her to death for disturbing the peace."

'_Wasn't it "for disturbing the peace of Namimori"...?_' thought Kusakabe, but decided to ignore it and went off to find that person's identity.

000

**6927/MukuTsu/MukuroTsuna**

_"Kufufufu..." chuckled Mukuro in a __lustful voice. He continued to lick the earlobe of his favorite tuna uke sensually. _

_A lot of erotic and moe-moe moans and screams were heard, courtesy of the heterochromatic owl seme's skills..._**  
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"HIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" shrieked Tsuna again with his trademark girly shriek. His face was very red from reading something so..._ intimate_. "Not again!" he shouted in dismay, not liking the 'tuna uke' and 'seme' thing. Not at all.

***Now, there were questions from Tsuna, the fujoshies' lovely tuna uk- I mean, heroi- uhh, correction, I mean _hero_.**

What is wrong with those fujoshies? Did they like BL that much?

He really didn't get why a female's mind was so different.

And, what the hell is 'moe-moe'?

***The definition of 'moe-moe' is basically 'cute' and well, the way women like BL is the same as men who like porn.**

"Seriously, who said that?" groaned Tsuna, thinking that he is going insane.

-0-0-

"Kufufufu..." laughed Mukuro with an angry tick mark on his head, clearly wanting to strangle the life out of the author who wrote that fanfiction. Who the fuck said that he'll be in a relationship with the Vongola Decimo, of all people? He just wanted to possess the Vongola Decimo's body.

***Well, that sounded wrong.**

But what ticked him off the most was that it wasn't intimate enough.

"Such an amateur." scoffed Mukuro haughtily.

***Well then, why don't you become a BL writer? Women think men who write BL are hot, just like that Usami dude who writes steamy BL from Junjou Romantica.**

"Kufufufu, who's there?" said the heterochromatic eyed illusionist with his usual creepy grin. "Is it that crappy author with no sort of elegance whatsoever?"

***Its the voice from above, which is I, Kami-sama and no, I do not write intimate scenes like these.**

"What the hell is 'Junjou Romantica' anyway?" the pineapple-haired male asked, clearly not knowing the awesome(dubbed by yaoi fangirls) BL manga/anime that is not to be missed by yaoi fangirls. 

***... That's what wikipedia is for. Oh and, its a BL thing. By the way, as advice, you must never say 'what the hell is Junjou Romantica' in front of fujoshies, unless you want to be forced to watch it 24/7.  
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At least Tsuna wasn't the only one...

000

**8027/YamaTsu/YamamotoTsuna**

_In a dimly-lit storeroom that stored all baseball equipments, Yamamoto was french kissing Tsuna, whose face was dusted with pink and being pinned at the wall. He felt that it was kind of wrong, though he clearly enjoyed it._

_"Why don't I turn that pink into a darker shade, hmm?"_

This time, Tsuna just fainted at the spot while foaming in his mouth. He fell from his chair with a loud 'thud', body crashing to the ground of his room.

He couldn't stand the _intimate _scenes of him and his friends.

***Aha, Dame-Tsuna might get a heart attack from Reborn soon.**

"Tsuna-nii, are you okay?" asked Fuuta, concern and worry in his voice as he opened the door. The 'thud' was really loud.

-0-0-

"... I think I'll go play baseball." said Yamamoto, while having a grin, though it was twitching madly, clearly disturbed by the _intimate_ scene he just read. "Yeah, baseball makes it all better."

Well, he only read it because the baby recommended it to him, saying it was 'baseball-related'.

***If it weren't for his happy-go-lucky-I-don't-fucking-care personality, he would've used his trusty baseball bat to do a homerun on the (poor) author to send her to Mars or maybe even further.**

000

**A/N:** Not gonna do it further since I'm not so sure if its good. If it is, please tell me by reviewing and request something! Like what the KHR cast will react to what. **For now, I am accepting anything with uke!Tsuna(27)**, all the other pairings **will ONLY** be **requested LATER**, I will **INFORM YOU IN MY A/Ns** when you can request other pairings.I want the order to be clean, not messy.

This is how the request thing works;

**Pairing:** *insert pairing with uke!Tsuna(27)*

**Sentence:** *insert sentence, like the ones that were in _italic_*

No worries, I will include your name in the words of our anime character, the person they want to murde- I mean, say. Ohohoho~

**[Review please, thank you. ;D I will only do another chapter until I get requests.]**


	2. React 2!

**Title: **KHR React!**  
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**Summary: **One day, Reborn finds a site called, 'fanfiction(dot)net', the heaven for all anime fantards and mostly, fujoshies aka yaoi fangirls. So, he decided to share the fanfiction made by fujoshies with the KHR cast. Oh dear...**  
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**Pairings(s): **None, its all crack with a side dish of anger, courtesy of the KHR cast.

**Warning(s): **Lots of hate from the KHR cast, unbeta'd. **  
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**A/N:** Here's the second chapter of KHR React! . Thank you for taking your time to review and request, btw! :) Hope you guys enjoy my fail humor!

"Normal speech."

'_Thoughts._'

***Voice from above, which is Kami-sama, a.k.a the author.**

000

**7227/HDWM!TsunaxTsuna/TsunayoshiTsuna**

_"You know you want it, as do I. Admit it and we can have a fun time..." said Tsunayoshi to his other self, Tsuna, who've seem to have been taken of his sense of mind._

_"Ugh! I... I... nghh..."_

_**[EK12]**  
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"WHAT!" screamed Tsuna in all his girly glory with a red face, enough to make a tomato jealous. In logical sense, 'that' Tsunayoshi(HDWM) does not exist since 'he' is basically a part of Tsuna. So, that would equal to...

***Oh hey, Tsuna actually thinks. I was beginning to doubt that his head even had a brain in it. I thought it was full of mushrooms and 'Kyoko' in it.  
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'_That means I'm hooked up... with myself?_' thought Tsuna who ignored the almighty Kami-sama, felt... 'my-mind-is-full-fuck' type of feeling and had that 'Excalibur expression', the one from Soul Eater.

Literally.

***Oh and, readers, whoever who is reading this, google 'Excalibur expression soul eater' and 'my mind is full of fuck' if you don't know.**

'_Who the hell is that voice talking to anyway?_' thought the brunet, clearly not knowing that this was actually being written and being read by others.

***Poor Tsuna. Oh, Tsuna just 'cussed' at me? I swear I'm going to make you wear a pink sparkly tutu while singing "I'm a Little Teapot". Be prepared.  
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And the almighty Kami-sama decided to continue writing what was happening and added another thing to do in his/her list of to-do's.

-0-0-

In Tsuna's mind, there was one entity who lived there, other being the 'brain' of course, but in the 'mentally' type of way, not 'physically'. Well, not exactly a separate being, but a part of Tsuna nonetheless.

"... I'm going to burn _**EK12**_ with my X-Burner..." said HDWM!Tsuna out loud with anger and venom dripping in his tone as he added 'burning**_ EK12_** with X-Burner' into his to-do-list. His eye was twitching badly from what he read through the eyes of his other counterpart.

He is so going to burn the author with X-Burner and a side dish of skin burns, kinda like Xanxus.

***I bet you won't be able to.**

"Who's there? No one else should be able to be here, unless you're a Mist Ring user..." he said, going into a battle stance. "Are you Rokudo Mukuro?" he asked warily.

***Well, am I laughing 'kufufufu' now?**

"No..."**  
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***There's your answer, I am not him, Dame-Tsuna no. 2. Its Kami-sama and yes, my voice can even resound in other people's inner world. I'm not a ring user, I'm Kami-sama.  
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"Don't say 'inner world'... it sounds so zen and its like a term used by old Japanese men with green tea while laughing 'ohohoho'..." he stated, ignoring the 'Dame-Tsuna no. 2' part.

***You have a big imagination, for being a part of Dame-Tsuna...**

"Is that a compliment or an insult?"

***Err... its a complisult? insuliment? I don't know.**

Well, lets just say HDWM!Tsuna just facepalmed. **  
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000

**0027/EnTsu/EnmaTsuna**

_The Shimon boss slipped his tongue in the hot cavern of the brunette._

_ As he broke the kiss with a thin thread of saliva still attaching them, he whispered, "Want to have fun, Tsuna-kun?"_

_**[Orithyea]**_

"W-w-with Enma...?" said Tsuna weakly, all the blood rushing to his face, making it much more redder than before. He can't even imagine it, doing 'it' with his friend and mafia ally! Thinking about 'it' made him blush even harder.

Yep, Tsuna looked like he had red paint all over his face or something.

Courtesy of Reborn and _**[Orithyea]**_.

***Hey Dame-Tsuna, if you keep blushing, your face might explode. Wait a minute, Dame-Tsuna knows about sex? Way to go, man. Though I still don't respect you**. **Who the hell blushes from thinking about 'sex'? Plus, you're a man, go watch porn or something.**

"W-w-wha-?" sputtered a very weak-looking ravishable Tsuna, the blush even creeping up to his ears.

***What, now you're even blushing from me mentioning about 'porn'? My respect for you is none. Its probably negative over 9000 or something. You can bet on that, bro.  
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"S-shut up!"

"Maman, Baka-Tsuna is talking to himself!" shouted Lambo, his ear was pressed against Tsuna's door.

"I'm sure Tsu-kun is just talking to one of his friends outside." smiled Nana, completely used to it already.

"Give me some privacy, damn it!"

***Give you some privacy to read BL? Tsk, tsk, Tsuna. I didn't know you _swung that way_.**

"I don't, you stupid-" but before Tsuna could continue, the almighty Kami-sama snapped his/her fingers and Tsuna found _himself wearing a pink sparkly tutu with added feathers_.

And wings.

Cue in the fujoshies' laughter and snorts.

***Shall I make you wear a pink tiara and sing "I'm a Little Teapot" as well?**

"I-i-its f-fine!" stuttered the poor brunet, not liking the tutu one bit. It felt embarrassing and most of all, itchy.

***Good.**

-0-0-

"U-u-umm..." stuttered Enma, feeling fidgety and scared from what he just read.

It was just like any other day and he used his laptop to check his emails. Then he found an email from Reborn. Wait, how did Reborn get his email? He never told anyone about it.

***Not like it matters, its Reborn, for fucking heaven's sake.**

Anyway, then he was told to read something from that link that was attached to that email. He decided to read it, until the part where the.. '_intimate_' scene began and he stopped reading it altogether.

In fact, when he read that part by pure accident, he just slammed his laptop with an audible 'clap'.

"Enma, what happened?" asked Adelheid as she walked into the room.

"I-i-its, not.. hing..."

She felt suspicious and since Enma was only having the laptop at that time, so it was only logical to take it. Adelheid then decided to open it, only to find the sentences;

_The Shimon boss slipped his tongue in the hot cavern of the brunette._

_ As he broke the kiss with a thin thread of saliva still attaching them, he whispered, "Want to have fun, Tsuna-kun?"_'

"..."

"A-ah.. e-e-er... I can e-explain..."

Adelheid just shoved the laptop back to Enma and just walked away, having misunderstandings floating in her mind and a few words.

'_What did I just..._'

***Poor Enma.**

That was the day that she thought her boss had an... unusual hobby.**  
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***Well, I can make Adelheid forget, Enma.**

"Who's t-t-there...?" asked the red-head warily. What if its an enemy mafioso?

***Its Kami-sama.**

"Can you r-r-reall-"

***Hell no, where would the fun be?**

"Then why did you even..."

***'Bother to ask'? Its fun making you feel hopeful, only to be shot down by moi.**

"..."

-0-0-

**G27/GioTsu/GiottoTsuna**

_"Admit it, you love me," the blonde said sensually as his hands groped his soon-to-be-lover's body. The brunet shrieked and flailed, trying to push the other male off of him..._

_**[Multi-Colored Canvas]**_

"With 'G-Giotto'...?" asked Tsuna to no one in particular then a lightbulb flashed above his head.

It was his**_ great-great-great grandpa_**.

"Why did I even bother to read..."

Well, if he didn't read it, he would've been punished by Reborn, though the latter would've been better... At least he wasn't wearing that ridiculous tutu anymore.

"I swear I'll hunt all the ridiculous authors down when I officially get the mafia boss title..."_  
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***Oh, an M are we?**

"W-w-what's an 'M', s-s-stranger..." asked the messy brunet who was grabbing his hair, thinking he might be going mad from hearing the one and only voice which belonged to the almight Kami-sama.

***Call me Kami-sama, fujoshies' favorite uk- I mean, _hero_. Oh and, without the stutters. You sound like Hinata from Naruto, she stutters too much. Since you may as well be the male equivalent to her, you might as well have a big /beep/ because she has a big rack-**

"Please, 'Kami-sama'... don't be so... perverted..." stuttered Tsuna once more, pleading to the almighty Kami-sama to not add salt into the wo- I mean, being so 'indecent'.

***Its true, why don't you google her looks from the Shippuden season? **

"And why do I even bother replying... and I'll just google what is an 'M' myself..."

***Because if you don't, I will make you wear stuff that can make your dignity burn into smithereens. By the way, google for 'masochist' for the full meaning. I suggest you go for the images first.**

"Oh.. kay...?"**  
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And at that moment, Tsuna google'd what 'masochist' is, and like the naive idiot he is, he went for the images first.

"!"

Let's just say he was greeted by many disturbing images and it scarred his brain.

Oh, let's not forget that he shrieked(that could make a banshee jealous) and foamed lots of bubbles.

-0-0-

**_Back at Primo's time, which is probably 400 years into the past..._**

"Oi, Primo, you got a letter!" shouted G, the first generation Storm Guardian, loudly as he came busting into Primo's office with a sparkly pink letter in his hand.

"G, its not nice to shout." said Ugetsu, the first generation Rain Guardian, while wiping his precious and trusty flute with a white cloth that wasn't too wet in order to preserve the beauty of his magnificent flute(lolwat).

"ITS NOT NICE TO SHOUT, TO THE EXTREME!" shouted Knuckles, the first generation Sun Guardian, in his boxing-mode, totally contradicted in what he had said just now.

"OI, YOU'RE SHOUTING TOO!"

"Ah, I extremely apologize to the extreme." replied Knuckles, in his saintly priest-mode with lots of bishie sparkles floating around him as he holds his bible.

And now Kami-sama thinks why is Knuckles so much like a pokemon.

"Who is it from?" asked Vongola Primo, a.k.a Giotto from his desk that is full of paperwork.

"There's no address on it."

"Well, that's okay. G, please read it for me, as you can see, I am handling lots of paperwork right now..." replied Giotto while signing all the papers he was currently handling. "And why is it pink and sparkly..?"

"How the hell would I know?" said G, irritated that it was _too sparkly and pink_ as well. "But it says," he coughed as he continued,

_Vongola Primo, you absolutely must_

_read it BY YOURSELF,_

_because,_

_this is the Will of Kami-sama._

_Your's truly,_

_Kami-sama~ *heart*_

"What is 'Kami-sama'?" asked Giotto curiously as his Japanese wasn't the greatest at that time yet.

"It is the equivalent to 'God' in Japanese, Giotto." answered Ugetsu while he smiled, still wiping his precious flute.

"Oh." came a simple reply from the Italian blonde.

"Then you must read it to the extreme by yourself, Giotto, since it said it was God's Will." said Knuckles, believing it was the message from Heaven itself.

Oh how wrong he was.

Giotto wanted to protest since he was too busy(or maybe he was just too lazy) but the stares(including a glare) from his guardians made him sigh and just took the letter upon himself. He cut open the letter, unfolded it and scanned the letter.

Then he choked.

"G-Giotto...?" asked one of his guardians who was worried that his own boss just choked on air, which was highly impossible since air cannot be touch in any way or form.

"WHAT THE-" and there came a PMS-ing Giotto, which was also highly impossible since Giotto is a man but its just a term, with shouts of colorful and fancy words in many languages and one of his legs on his desk. Then he flipped the desk over and burned the letter with his dying will flame, which was now the flames of he- err, wrath.

But it didn't burn.

All the words melted and there it was,

a troll face.

A friggin' troll face which didn't even exist yet 400 years ago.

To Giotto, it was creepy and mocking him.

"..."

"Oi, oi, Giotto..."

Then Kami-sama snickered.

"Who's there..." said Giotto with a deadly aura around him, his guardians edging away, even though his guardians heard the voice as well. They swore that they could see Medusa's snakes behind him, hissing angrily and venom dripping from their fangs.

***Kami-sama.**

came a simple reply.

And all hell broke loose when Giotto ordered everyone to find the true identity of someone called _**Multi-Colored Canvas**_, 'Tsunayoshi' and someone so-called, 'Kami-sama' and he shot them multiple of times if they didn't.

Many, many years later into the future he found out that it was his great-great-great grandson.

In the Vongola Sky Ring, Giotto facepalmed because he felt like a pedophile and Daemon snickered and snorted all the way.

000**  
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**10027/ByaTsu/ByakuranTsuna**

_Byakuran slid his tongue into Tsuna's mouth as he successfully coaxed the other's tongue into a sinful dance. "You taste better than any marshmallow Tsu-chan~!"_

_**_[The0Hidden0Key]_**_

"..."

There was a pregnant silence hanging around in Tsuna's room.

***Pshh, 'pregnant'. **

Here comes to facepalm.

***Oh, are you speechless now, Dame-Tsuna? Too speechless because of the sexiness that is oozing out from the fanfiction you've just read?**

came a sarcastic remark from the almighty Kami-sama.

"..."

***Oi, you better reply the great me before I make you run around town with a hooker outfit.**

"...I don't get the world anymore..." said a depressed Tsuna in a fetal position. "I think this is worse than Reborn's spartan training..."

***Oh? Hmm... If... you say so... be careful what you wish for, Dame-Tsuna~!**

Kami-sama just grinned evilly.

Thank god he/she had a camera right now.

He/She was sooo sending the footage to Reborn.

"Wha... aat..."

Then Tsuna felt chills down his spine. He had a REALLY bad feeling about what he just said, and he was so going to regret that he had ever said it in the first place.

Ah, how Kami-sama loves to mess with the lives of anime characters.

-0-0-

_**At the prison Byakuran is staying at...**_

"Oi, prisoner no. 0100!" shouted a warden, whose face was hidden, dressed in all black with a gun strapped to his left leg, holding a pink sparkly letter, similar to the one Giotto had received and regretted that he ever opened it.

"Yes~?" came a melidious reply from prisoner no. 0100, a.k.a Byakuran who turned around to see the warden, bishie sparkles floating around him as if he were an innocent servant who took the title of 'criminal' to save his sister a.k.a the princess from a sad fate like _Servant of Evil by Kagamine Len_-

***Wait, where the heck did that description come from? Oh right, this is supposed to be full of crack and fail humor.  
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"There's a letter for you." said the warden, totally unamused by Byakuran's bishie sparkles that were floating around him. In fact, it was burning his eyes.

"Ehh~? Did you finally fall for me, Mr. Warden~?" asked Byakuran who giggled _-yes, giggled-_ and roses started to bloom behind him, even though the prison was definitely not the greatest place where flowers can bloom.

"No, I'm perfectly straight and I have a girlfriend." said the warden who coughed. "You drunk or something? Men don't giggle."

"Well, I did drink some good alcohol that was given to me by yesterday's warden on the night shift." replied the white-haired male, who then proceeded to ask, "Who's it from~?"

'_I am so gonna kill him for sharing alcohol with prisoners..._' "I don't know, but its addressed to you." and the warden just gave the _monstrous letter_ to Byakuran, not wanting to see it anymore as it burns his eyes.

Byakuran received the letter and the warden proceeded to leave, he needed to have a 'talk' with yesterday's warden on the night shift.

_Previous Milliefore Boss, Byakuran, _

_you must read this letter_

_and if you survive it_

_you shall be given_

_a year's supply of marshmallow_

_while you're in prison._

_Your's truly,_

_Kami-sama~ *heart*_

"Marshmallows...?" mumbled the marshmallow lover as he drooled, thinking about the heavenly gift from the Gods called 'marshmallows'. He cut open the letter, unfolded it and scanned the letter.

There was a pregnant pause.

"Hey, Jean, you hear that?"

"What? I hear no nothing-" then the second warden realized that prisoner no.0100(Byakuran) was _quiet_.

_Too quiet._

Usually he would call out 'warden-chan' or something and give out random facts like how a woman-

Nevermind. _  
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"I hear an apocalypse comin', Jean."

"... Ah, it seems that when I get out of here, I am going to find someone named '**_The0Hidden0Key_'** and someone nicknamed, 'Kami-sama'~" said Byakuran out loud, with an angry tick mark on his head.

Marshmallows be damned, he ain't gonna let someone write about him and Vongola together, as an intimate couple.

***Though you'll never be able to find us, Byakuran. If a fujoshi dies, another one shall appear. They're basically like an ever-growing family of fangirls, kinda like pokemon. Err, 'fujomon'.  
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"Ara, who is that~? I thought I was the only one in here~"

***Its the almighty Kami-sama.**

"Where are you~?"

***Above.**

"You're dead? Or are you clinging onto the ceiling because I am going to brutally murder you~?"

***I am clearly alive though I am not clinging onto the ceiling. I'm 'above' because I'm looking at you from 'above', though not physically. I'm observing you through something the modern people call 'computer'. Do you know what that is?**

"Of course I do, I'm not a caveman, Mi-kun~" replied the prisoner, wanting to use _White Dragon_ and _Black Dragon_(his box weapons) on whoever 'Kami-sama' is.

***Then don't question me. At least you're logical enough not to call me 'Ka-chan', makes me sound like a mother, though I clearly don't have children.  
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000

_**Recap: Before the written R27 piece of 'literature'...**_

***Hey, Vongola Nono~**

"Zzzz..."

***Oiii, Vongola Nono~~**

"Zzzzzzzzzz..."

And Kami-sama decided to send his/her holy foot down from heaven to _elegantly_ kick Vongola Nono. Yeah, sarcasm intended there.

"Who are you?" asked Vongola Nono as he was woken up _elegantly_ from his sleep. As an old man, he really needs his sleep!

***Do you have an email account? Oh and, its Kami-sama, damn it! How many times have people asked me that!**

"Why would you need my email account for?" asked Nono as he raised one of his eyebrows, completely confused that a stranger(***its Kami-sama!**) would want his email account.

***Oh, for pranking the no. 1 hitman. **

"You do know that Reborn would blow your head off while looking cool, right?"

***Relax, 'pa, he will never find me. You'll see the results of my awesome 'joke' soon.**

'_Did he just call me "pa'?_' thought Nono with a chuckle, only used to being called 'Vongola Nono', 'Nono', along those lines. Never 'pa', unless it was 'jii-chan', courtsey of his soon-to-be successor. "Well, sure, if you send me his reactions, I'd be fine."

***Wow, that was extremely easy. I'd thought you surely would just ignore me or something, 'pa.**

"Well, my Hyper intuition tells me you don't even have any rings, let alone a Mist Ring so how can you be hidden?" asked Nono logically. "You aren't even physically here anyway."**  
><strong>

***Well, thanks. Just type in your email account and password into the 'Notepad' and put your laptop under your bed. **

"Why do you need my laptop as well?"

***Because Reborn might track down my computer's brand and type, so he'll know that it isn't from you or something. I don't use a laptop and you ONLY have a laptop. It is Reborn after all. Well, enough of the chit chat, just leave it under your bed.**

Nono complied and left his laptop under his desk and the next thing he knew, he saw a hand taking it and it just disappeared.

What?**  
><strong>

000

**R27/ReboTsuna/RebornTsuna**

_Reborn licked Tsuna's bleeding cheek as he pinned him down the ground. "R-Reborn I-", Tsuna moaned as he was cut off by Reborn kissing him passionately._

_**[Bishi-bishi]**  
><em>

"HIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

***Enough of your shrieks, Dame-Tsuna. My ears will bleed.**

"He's a baby!"

***Can't you tell its his adult form? Unless you're into little children.**

"With Reborn, of all people...?" asked Tsuna particularly to no one, completely horrified and ignoring what Kami-sama had just remarked. As if the 'M incident' wasn't enough, there was another to scar him completely.

***Oh, don't tell me you prefer being with the others-**

"Of course not! I like Kyoko! Only her!"

***But, you don't even get together with her, so you're getting desperate and your tutor is also the next best option? Wow, someone's desperate.**

"Its all f-f-fiction!"

***Then, why so worked up?**

"Because, I feel like I can t-t-turn... gay..."

***You can't 'turn' gay, Dame-Tsuna. You're either born to be straight, bisexual or homosexual unless you're born to be homo? Le gasp! Wait till the mafia media hears this piece of juicy news!  
><strong>

"N-no way! I-i-i-impossible!" said Tsuna as he did an 'X' with his hands while shaking his head repetitively.

"Ara, Tsu-kun, who are you talking to?" asked Nana as she opened the door, blinking at the sight of her son talking to no one.

"A-a-ah, mom, it doesn't seem what it looks l-like-"

"Oh my, Tsu-kun, are you talking to spiritual beings?" asked Nana, sparkles emitting from her as she proceeded to hug him. "I'm so proud, wait till I tell dear!" and she ran off to the phone.

Tsuna was just left there, dumfounded.

Kami-sama snickered.

-0-0-

"Hmm, an email from Nono?" said Reborn, not expecting it to even happen. He clicked it and it opened. Turns out it was his next 'assignment'.

_Reborn, all the information you need for your next mission is down here, just scroll below. _

_-Nono_

"Hmmm..." deciding that it was 'safe', he scrolled down and scanned it.

Only then he realized that there was a work of fiction there that included him and his dame-student.

As an intimate couple.

"Who the fuck..." cussed Reborn out loud, in no way in hell that he and that Dame-Tsuna will be together, as an intimate couple.

'_Dame-Tsuna is still infinity years too early to be even be in a relationship with me._' thought the black haired hitman. He decided to scroll down more to see the one(s) responsible, since he realized that the author(s) who wrote the fiction will always leave their names somewhere.

_**Bishi-bishi**_ was the name he found.

"I am so going to shoot bullets into this person's head and drown her into the Pacific Ocean." he swore dangerously.

Then, he heard some faint laughter, but he couldn't pin-point from where, though.

"Who's there." he said, it wasn't a question but more of a statement. A dangerous one.

***Someone.**

"Are you the idiot called '_**bishi-bishi**_', the one who has a death wish?" asked Reborn, raven-eyes narrowing and changing Leon into a gun. "I'll be sure to grant that wish of your's for free." he added with venom.

***Kami-sama and how many times have I've been through this? Its starting to get boring!**

"No shit, Sherlock, I just want this to get done with." he replied, his resolve to kill the author not wavering one bit. "How did this idiot even get Nono's email account anyway...?"

***Actually, it was me who sent it to you. Though I didn't write that piece of fiction.**

"How the fuck?"

***Because I'm the almighty Kami-sama, I can get anything I want.**

"You're starting to sound as annoying as someone I know..."

***Shall I do an evil laugh now? Like 'shishishi', 'kufufufu', 'nufufufu' or my own laugh? Though, 'mwuahaha' is kinda outdated...**

"Why the hell did I even read it..."

***Well, its called 'tasting your own medicine', Reborn. And, its lovely looking at your stupid reaction.**

All hell broke loose once more and Reborn went trigger-happy while trying to find our identities.

***Oh Reborn, you'll never find us.**

000

While everybody(who were the poor unfortunate victims) were either face-palming, trigger-happy, rampaging, thinking of many torture ways or just doing it all it once...

Nono chuckled at Reborn's reaction,

Kami-sama was thinking of the next thing to do,

A trollface was glued upon Giotto's tombstone,

and fangirls just lol'd.

Fear not, there's more to come.

000

**A/N:** Well, that was my longest chapter yet in history! xD Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did while writing it. I never expected myself to update that fast. Sorry for the mistakes! Well, be sure to check the reviews to see if your request for a certain couple has already been taken! **For now, its still uke!Tsuna~~~**

Request system;

**Pairing:** *insert pairing with uke!Tsuna(27)*

**Sentence:** *insert sentence, like the ones that were in _italic_*

**[See you again in the next chapter! Don't forget to review and request or I'll be sure to show up as the Boogie Man!]**


	3. React 3!

**Title: **KHR React!**  
><strong>

**Summary: **One day, Reborn finds a site called, 'fanfiction(dot)net', the heaven for all anime fantards and mostly, fujoshies aka yaoi fangirls. So, he decided to share the fanfiction made by fujoshies with the KHR cast. Oh dear...**  
><strong>

**Pairings(s): **None, its all crack with a side dish of anger, courtesy of the KHR cast.

**Warning(s): **Lots of hate from the KHR cast, unbeta'd. Oh and, some unrelated/irrelevant references.

**A/N:** Omg, the 3rd chapter already? Since when did I work so hard? Haha! And thank you for all the lovely reviews! You know, when I was writing the 2nd chapter, I wished someone would request 5927(this couple needs more love) and my wish came true... in the form of a mini-review-flood! xD Omg, it was hard choosing which one to write but, I only took one in the end, sorry to those who didn't get chosen. There were a few similar ones already and to make it fair I had to basically...

**Reviewer A** = had 2 requests, so I took 1.

**Reviewer B** = had 1 request(that was the same as A), so I took from B and left the similar one from A.

Yep, it was kinda confusing but it became okay in the end. :)

"Normal speech."

'_Thoughts._'

***Voice from above, which is Kami-sama, a.k.a the author.  
><strong>

000

**5927/GokuTsuna/GokuderaTsuna**

_"Go-Gokudera-ku-kun", Tsuna whimpered as he was being pinned on the wall by Gokudera. Tsuna moaned as he was being kissed on the neck. Gokudera stripped defenseless Tsuna and licked his creamy white shoulders. "I promise to protect you, Jyuudaime.", Gokudera whispered as he and Tsuna went for a deep sexy kiss._

_**[Bishi-bishi]**_

"... E-e-err, why am I still doing this..?" groaned Tsuna, as if he didn't have enough of the 'Yaoi Fiction Flood 2011', he dubbed it oh-so _lovingly_.

***That's the main point of this fiction.**

"What?" asked Tsuna dumbly, clearly not knowing that his and his friends' reactions are being seen by the 'fujomons'.

Cue in the laughs, snorts and giggles, which are totally directed at Dame-uke-tuna-hero-Tsuna-chama-tan-nyan-koi.

** *And did you know that I'm recording your reactions?**

"Eh... EHHHHHHHH!"

***Oh come on, why not share the laughs and giggles with our lovely fangirls?**

Cue in Kami-sama's snickering.

"So that means..." said Tsuna, completely horrified. Too horrified that he can't even continue his sentence.

***That means women lik- err, LOVE seeing you being the ultimate uke of ukes? Well, the KHR cast is mostly made up of men, so why the fuck not?**

"..."

***Did you know that Kyoko is a yaoi fangirl?**

"..."

***...That's probably why she never goes out with you.  
><strong>

-0-0-

_**Wherever the heck Gokudera lives, which is most probably in Tsuna's closet as everyone has never ever seen his house in Namimori before...**_

"Oh f-f-fuck.." muttered Gokudera over and over, with stutters and pink tinted cheeks. Yeah, _stutters and pink tinted cheeks_. He quickly shook his head and slapped himself a few times.

'_How dare this shit-called-author(sorry!) try to defile the Tenth's innocence..._'

***Wow, you care more about your boss' pride? Did he even have any? You dog, care more about yourself! Like that time during the Ring Battle, you almost died and your bossu-uke had to beg from yo-**

"WHO'S THERE? ARE YOU THAT LOW-LIFE? COME OUT BEFORE I DOUBLE BOMB YOU." he hissed loudly.

Today was so not his day.

***Kami-sama, damn it! Stop asking! Figure it out yourself, maths-wizard!**

"Heh, 'Kami-sama'..?" said Gokudera then suddenly, a light bulb flashed brightly in his head comically, indicating that he had an idea. "Are you an... U.M.A?" his eyes were literally glittering and shimmering with sparkles, however the hell that happened.

***...Sure, whatever you like to call me.**

Came the sarcastic reply. Key word, SARCASTIC.

Let's just say Kami-sama got interrogated by a professor Gokudera with glasses who totally forgot about the fanfiction he read earlier.

000

**(unknown number?)/RyoTsu/RyoheiTsuna**

_The shirtless boxing athlete began to kiss Tsuna roughly as he went and tied the brunette's wrist with the laces that are on the boxing gloves, behind the brunette's back I might add._

_**[anon: korakorakufufufuf]**_

"HIEEEEEEEE, ONII-SAN?" screamed one uke brunet we all know, mostly loved and fantasized by fujomons.

Yeah, fujomons.

***Wow, indirect incest much? Incest-ception? TROLOLOL-**

Yes, Kami-sama is a troll.

Just like what he/she did in the previous chapter to Giotto.

Tsuna just fell on his bed, completely drenched in sweat and horrified-feelings that was swirling in his guts, probably the leftover food from last night.

As if the 'Reborn version' wasn't bad enough.

***Oh, I hear a sneeze from a distant place. Wait, isn't Reborn supposed to have a life-long flu now? His enemies talk about how they want to kill him in every way possible while fujomons talk about how Tsuna and him should work out together,_ in that way_, wink wink.**

The Dame-uke-tuna-hero-Tsuna-chama-tan-nyan-koi just sighed(**Tsuna:** what's up with that nickname?) for the 100th time today.

He hoped that there weren't anymore of the 'yaoi flood'.

Oh, how he spoke too soon.

***TROLOLOL.**

-0-0-

"Ex.." muttured Ryohei. "..t-t-treme..."

He really didn't know what to comment on the yaoi fiction he had just read.

***Ryohei trembles in fear? YE GADS!**

"I MUST DO 9000 LAPS, PUSH-UPS, UPPER-CUTS, MORE LAPS, KICKS, UPPER KICKS, MORE AND MORE LAPS AND BOXING TO THE EXTREEMEEEEE!" Ryohei stated out, loud and clear on what he was going to do for the rest of the whole week. "AND MORE KICKS, UPPER-CUTS, ETC ETC ETC ETC-"

**WARNING: ERROR. ERROR. Ryohei Sasagawa is on _spam-trainer-mode_, please be careful and take caution while you are near him in any way or form. 'We' are not responsible if you have a broken nose or a torn limb, thank you.**

And cue in more shouts and statements of pure determination.

***Wow, never knew Ryohei can be reborn'd into a determined trainer from just a _small_ yaoi fiction.** **Better tell Reborn about this shit, but he might shoot bullets into my head first..**

Yep, that kind of fiction was considered 'small'.

By fujomons.

That week, in the whole of Namimori, shouts of 'EXTREME' were heard, loud and clear.

Even at night.

During that time, unknown to anyone, Kyoko giggles at her brother's crazy antics.

000

**8427/BaTsu/BasilTsuna**

_"Mhmmnn..." the brunetee groaned as Basil began to lick the brunette's neck as he unbuttoned Tsuna's middle school uniform._

_**[anon: korakorakufufufuf]**_

"Are you friggin' serious..." mumbled our favorite hero, who is unfortunately having a terrible time, courtesy of Reborn and the bullying of Kami-sama.

***At least its better than Reborn's version, no?**

"Wow, Kami-sama actually tries to comfort me rather than poke fun of me?" drawled Tsuna sarcastically, the emotional scars from the previous 'Yaoi Fiction Flood' and the horrors of google images completely making him just... insane. Since it was the second day of his _lovely torture_, he dubbed it _oh-so lovingly_ once more as 'Yaoi Flood: Day 2'.

***Don't be so mean, Tsuna-poo, I only TRIED to comfort you. Besides, Basil is a good guy. **

"...'Tsuna-poo', are you serious...?" asked Tsuna, though it sounded more like a confession than a question.

"And again... Are. You. Serious." said the brunet, his sentences sounding more like statements of monotone. "Last time I checked, Basil thought we were singing enka when we were singing our duet character song."

***Why yes, I am. Oh, I remember that. Good times, no?**

"..."

Tsuna didn't bother to say anything anymore.

***U mad, bro?**

-0-0-

"I think I have j-just.. read something called a 'doujinshi'..." mumbled Basil, who've just read something he was unable to comprehend or grasp; something we call 'yaoi fiction' or just 'BL'.

***You almost got it right, Basil, only thing is that doujinshi is a fan manga, not fan_fiction_.**

"Wherefore art thou, ye's voice that resounds in this very room..." replied Basil, using the very type of old English which is Middle English, that even Kami-sama wasn't really able to understand.

***Oh please, Basil, speak in modern English. Most people don't understand Middle English. Talking to you is like learning History. Who wants to know about dead people anyway?  
><strong>

"Who art thou?" asked Basil, ignoring what Kami-sama had said just now. He was curious of the voice that he was hearing in wherever he is.

***... A long dead samurai that died in Italy.**

It was merely a sarcastic reply. SARCASTIC being the key word.

And again, there was another Gokudera in Italy in the form of a shorter male with dirty blonde hair.

000

**C27/ColoTsu/ColonnelloTsuna**

_''I love you, kora...''Colonnello said. _  
><em>''S-stop it...'' <em>  
><em>''I cant hold myself anymore, kora...'' <em>  
><em>''Colonnello... p-p-please... don't...'' Tsuna said breathlessly...<em>

**_[Tsukiyonaka97]_**

"ANOTHER BABY? HIEEEEE!" shouted Tsuna hysterically while pulling his mop of brown hair with his hands. He really had enough of the 'Yaoi Fiction Flood 2011', seriously.

He was about to explode.

***Its the adult version of him, you dolt, like I said in the previous chapter. Unless, you're really a 14 year old pedophile.. And how else is he able to pin you down? Though it should be possible, since there's gun-wielding babies who can kick a person thrice or more than their size.  
><strong>

"WHAT PREVIOUS CHAPTER?" asked the hysteric brunet, ignoring the 'pedophile' part. He still didn't know that the whole thing was divided into multiple chapters, only knowing that Kami-sama was recording everything single thing.

Cue in the laughs and snorts please.

***Oh, nothing.**

"GAH!" shouted the ultimate uke of ukes, already unable to comprehend the situation. He was already falling into the hysterical side of him.

***You know, I find it unexpected that you CAN deal with gun-wielding babies namely Reborn, the Italian Mafia, being the boss of a mafia family which its name technically translates to 'clam', being bullied by more similar hardcore babies, time-travel and other catastrophes I don't fucking remember but you CAN'T deal with yaoi fiction? Oh dear god, Tsuna, and you thought you were the sane one.**

"..."

Again, Tsuna was just speechless at Kami-sama. Wait a minute...

Tsuna's greatest question was...

Who is exactly Kami-sama?

-0-0-

"KORA!" shouted Colonnello, having a more spartan-mixed-with-surprise attitude and with the feeling of 'what-the-fuck-did-I-just-read', or something like that.

'_Oh no, I did not just read gay fiction, kora!_' shouted Colonnello mentally as he slapped himself a few times. '_Especially with the 10th Vongola Boss! He's like some scrawny stick, kora!_'

Colonnello + panicking = ...not Colonnello?

'_Lal's boobs are better!_' he shouted mentally and kept on repeating 'Lal's boobs' like a mantra in his mind.

***...Er-**

"Who's there, kora!" shouted Colonnello

***A long dead warrior that fought for justice in Italy. I died an epic death. Though my bones are probably long gone by now... **

Another similar reply came, Kami-sama finding that his/her previous answer in the previous chapter was too... dull and boring.

"You sure, kora?" asked the blonde arcobaleno with a skeptical look.

***Yes siree.**

"Hmm.."

***Colonnello, which do you prefer, yaoi fiction or-**

Before Kami-sama could continue, Colonnello quickly shouted, "Lal's boobs!" since he was totally horrified of this thing we call 'yaoi fiction' and yeah, Kami-sama had already anticipated the answer so he/she readied a recorder.

Click.

**_*Collonello, which do you prefer, yaoi fiction or-_**

_"Lal's boobs!"_

Click click.

"Oh shi-"

***I'm gonna show it to Lal.**

"Wai-"

***Too late.**

Let's just say that day, Colonnello almost got killed and buried 5 feet into the ground of CEDEF's outdoor training grounds by one angry navy-haired baby and Colonnello never trusted voices that told him they were 'warriors of justice'.

000

**9527/KyoTsu/KyokoTsuna**

_Tsuna couldn't believe it, Kyoko agreed to go out with him! As he thought of what they could do as a couple, Kyoko smirked darkly, stopped, and then coughed. The slightly taller brunet snapped out of his daydream and turned to Kyoko._

_"Yes Kyoko-chan?"_

_Kyoko couldn't help but squeal and glomp Tsuna. Tsuna blushed. Unknown to him, Kyoko was holding a wig and some rope..._

**_[Multi-Colored Canvas]_**

"Well, at least its not anymore of those weird fiction..." sighed Tsuna in relief. Good thing is that he read something about him AND Kyoko together, as a couple!

***Well, gee, Dame-Tsuna, did you not read the last part there?**

"What part?" he asked curiously. There was definitely nothing wrong with this piece of fiction, if he say so himself.

***Gah, you dimwit! _'Kyoko couldn't help but squeal and glomp Tsuna. Tsuna blushed. Unknown to him, Kyoko was holding a wig and some rope...'_, got it?**

"... _'Kyoko couldn't help but squeal and glomp Tsuna. Tsuna blushed. Unknown to him, Kyoko was holding a wig and some rope...'_... huh?" the ultimate uke recited, not really knowing what it meant.

***It means, Dame-Tsuna, you are about to get raped by multiple fujomons and dressed up according to their wild BL fantasies and weird fetishes, you with me so far?**

Tsuna, being the naive ultimate uke he is, still didn't really understand what it meant.

***Sigh, what did Reborn do to you that made you the 10th Vongola Boss in the future anyway? And by fetishes, I mean like BDSM, cat-boy costumes, cross-dressing..**

"Eh...EHHH!" the brunet shouted, completely dumbfounded.

***Which concludes that Kyoko would never date you because she enjoys looking at you with a guy harem, ya know?**** I'm not so sure about Haru, though..**

-0-0-

Kyoko just giggled at what she had read. Yes, _giggled_.

In a completely fangirly way.

"Maybe I should set up an offline meeting with this fanfiction writer..." she giggled again.

Which reminds her to buy some rope and hair extensions, plus some girly-revealing maid outfits.

And the shouts of 'EXTREME!' can still be heard.

(sorry if it was short!)

000

**D27/DiTsu/DinoTsuna**

_"Hey, little bro!" Dino started running towards Tsuna. Unfortunately and very expected, he tripped, thus landing in a very awkward position on the soon-to-be-boss._

_"Tsu-tsuna.." His lust overcame him as he crashed his lips into the younger one._

_**[Orithyea]**_

"HIEEEEEEEEE!" he shouted without a stop to take a breath, not even a single one. He kept on shouting some mumbo-jumbos which cannot be identified since it was all mushed together in one sentence.

Yes, _one sentence_.

Which means he fell into his hysterical side of his. Oh, Tsuna, and you thought you were the sane one.

After a few minutes, he just fell, face flat onto the ground, having a complete meltdown in his brain.

***Hahaha, Tsuna, don't forget, the 'Yaoi Fiction Flood 2011' won't end just yet... hehehe...**

-0-0-

"Boss, are you doing your work?" asked Romario as he knocked on his boss' office's door lightly, loud enough for Dino to hear.

"I am!" replied Dino with a shout.

"If you say so, boss." his trusty subordinate said as he retreated, back to his own work.

_ 'Ahhhh more~~~!'_

_'Scream my name, Risa!'_

Yup, Dino was watching porn.

Well, every man has his needs.

**Beep.**

"What interrupted my _work_..?" asked Dino, annoyed by the 'beep' which interrupted his 'work'. Yes, Dino considers watching porn as 'work'.

_Email received._

Dino sighed as he paused the video and clicked the email he had received.

_Please read this carefully, Boss of Chiavarone._

"Hmm?" he said, questioning the importance of the email to himself. After deciding to read it due to curiosity and wanting to go back to his 'work', he scrolled down.

He scanned the email and turned so red that could make a tomato jealous.

"W-w-what-" he sputtered, totally suprised and caught off-guard by a _simple_ yaoi fiction.

Thud.

Let's just say that a few seconds later, Dino foamed and fell off his chair.

000

**A/N:** I apologize for my fail humor. xD and yes, finally done, totally sorry if chapter 3 sucked! Oh and, are some of you wondering why Kyoko was included even though its still supposed to be uke!Tsuna? Well, 10 years into the future, if memory serves me right, TYL!Kyoko calls Tsuna 'Tsu-kun'(though my other side tells me its 'Tsu-**chan**') but they are neither childhood friends, best friends, lovers nor engaged. Don't you think its a little suspicious? So, theory is that, Kyoko approves of uke!Tsuna. Teehee.

Don't forget today that we learned, Dino thinks watching porn is work. Well, every man DOES have his needs...

This is how the request thing works;

**Pairing:** *insert pairing with uke!Tsuna(27) or Vongola-centric(ex: like guardiansxguardians other than guardiansxTsuna)*

**Sentence:** *insert sentence, like the ones that were in _italic_*

**Extra Question:** What do you think the next pairings shall be related to, after the Vongola-centric and uke!Tsuna? Example: Shimon-centric, het pairings, crack pairings, rare pairings... yeah, you get my point.

**[Review and share your opinions! If you are going to request, remember to check in review box if your's is already taken, unless you want war against another ffnet user..]**


	4. React 4!

A/N: Wow, it's been so long since I've updated... *almost gets hit by a truck driven by crazy fangirls* Phew.. well, looking back at what I wrote, I sort of.. uh... cringed at my own writing. Have I improved over these years? *puppy eyes*

Anyways, this is the last chapter of KHR React! . I can't let this fic go on for too long, no matter how many strange-crack pairings there are in the KHR fandom.. I hope you enjoyed it so far!

"Normal speech."

'_Thoughts._'

"**Kami-sama/fangirl(s) speak.**"

* * *

><p><strong>[ KHR REACT ]<strong>

**CHAPTER 4 - REACT 4! **

**THE LAST **

* * *

><p>"So... <em>what<em> are we doing here, kora?" asked Colonello, irritated by the fact that everyone was cramped in Tsuna's(or the lord of ukes) rather tiny teenager bedroom. Although he was a military guy at heart(you know, guns, riffles, having shared quarters with comrades or hardcore camping), he _couldn't_ (yes, couldn't), and would _rather not_ be in the same room as the same guy that ruined his chances with Lal Mirch.

There was the current Vongola Generation, the 10th Generation who looked either nervous, pissed or confused.

The Arcobaleno... well, those who got involved previously in the Yaoi Fiction Flood.

The Milliefore Boss, Byakuran, who is looking extremely pissed since he was eating all the marshmallows in godly lightspeed.

The Chiavarone Boss, Dino Cavallone who is very nervous at the moment.

The Shimon Boss, Enma Cozarto. He looked like a drowned cat with too much bandages.

Kyoko Sasagawa who looked pleasantly oblivious to what was going on(like hell she was going to show it on her face that she enjoys uke!Tsuna with a multiple harem!).

Last but not least, Reborn, the world's greatest hitman, sitting faaaaaa~r away from Tsuna, sipping on his espresso calmly.

(Yes, Reborn is awesome enough to be said individually.)

(Where are the others, like Basil as a prime example? I don't know, maybe they got pulled into the yaoi ice cream truck?)

"I s-should be the one asking why you're all.. in my.. bedroom..." muttered Tsuna, trailing off depressingly. Although he favored having Kami-sama giving him mindfucks since he wouldn't get hurt physically(although there will never be enough mind bleach for poor traumatized Tsuna)... being in the same room as the most dangerous (or least sane) people he knows would get him killed.

Plus, Reborn could murder him in 0.00000000000001("world's greatest" isn't a joke) seconds flat.

And make it look like suicide.

'_Good thing there's Kyoko-chan!_' he thought, blushing heavily at the thought. Him, and Kyoko Sasagawa, in the same room! That thought made him feel all fluttery in the inside-

"Stop blushing like a virgin, Dame-Tsuna." said Reborn, as cool as a cucumber.

_"As cool as a cucumber"..._

Then there was uncontrollable laughing, hiccups and it died down.

"**Haha, 'as cool as a cucumber'... I always found this funny.**" stated Kami-sama. He wiped away a stray tear from laughing uncontrollably. "**Never gets old, hahahaha..**"

"IT'S YOUUUUU!" shouted Tsuna, Enma, Collonello, and some others.

"IT'S THE U.M.A!" shouted Gokudera, hysterical.

"**It's me.**" replied Kami-sama. "**I'm not an U.M.A, Goku-chan, that's offending. I'm the most fabulous Kami-sama you'll ever find. I even have an equally awesome and fabulously fabulous religion with followers called 'fujomons'. Wonderful, isn't it?**"

"So you're saying that you're a "fabulous U.M.A with followers"." deadpanned Gokudera, a statement, not a question. U. , although fascinating and exciting to Gokudera, this one was just... irritating.

"**It's Kami-sama to you, damn it!**" shouted Kami-sama, frustrated. "**Bow down to me and my elite army of fujomons! They will attack you with their dirty thoughts, immobilize you with their fetish cosplay costumes and petrify you with their yaoi goggles! MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**"

Cue the evil fangirl laughter, giggling and chuckles that were definitely seeped with madness and insanity. The lesser sane fangirls just did a stereotypical Villian Laughter with fake explosions and colored smoke behind them, not caring about their surroundings.

"... what the hell are you, you're no 'epic warrior'..." said Colonello, his aura definitely screamed "DIE!". He was lied to!

"Oh, Collonello, you actually believed what it said?" said Reborn, snorting in arrogance(haha). "You're really... haha.. _such a blond_."

"**Oh em gee, Reborn made a blond joke!**" shouted a random fangirl from the "other world".

"**AWWWW, BURNNNNN!**" shouted the others, supporting Reborn more than Collonello. Poor him.

"**Did I just hear some sizzling?**" a fangirl asked mockingly.

"**Pszhhh.**" someone made a noise similar to burning(or sizzling?).

"**Aww, poor Collonello, do you just get too much salt in your wound?**" a fangirl cooed, also from the "other world".

"**Do you need a burn heal, Collo-boo?**" a hardcore yaoi pokemon asked, giggling madly.

Apparently, fangirls find Reborn snorting and making a blond joke extremely(EXTREMEEEEEELY!) funny.

While Reborn basked in his own arrogance and pride, the others just asked "Kami-sama" a certain question..

"Are you even 'Kami-sama'-"

"**Duhhh.**" replied the very bored Kami-sama.

"**Praise Kami-sama for the creation of the most magical thing which is BL!**"

"**Hell yeah!**"

"We need answers for our questions then." said one of the characters.

"**If you're wondering where the other world is, I can't tell you. It's a trade secret.**"

One of them clicked their tongue.

"Actually we needed to ask-"

"**If there was an ending to this? Yes.**"

Only Tsuna sighed in relief. The others were too confused to say anything.

"**Just kidding, the ending is gonna be half-assed.**"

"What?"

"**Which means you'll all suffer in BL, drown in it AND LOVE IT!**"

All of them were absolutely clueless on what he was saying. Seriously, what?

"**Brb while imma watch Psycho-Pass.**"

and never came back.

* * *

><p><strong>AN**: yep, ending was gonna be half-assed since this was basically reactions only.. so I might as well end it like a half-assed author on too much crack.


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